This morning, our next-door neighbours — they’re a little more conservative than us, yes, but we get along pretty well — are swearing in their country’s first African-American (well, everyone keeps calling him that, although his slipperiness with regard to racial categorization is part of what allows us all to identify with him) president, and we couldn’t be happier.
I’m ill-equipped to comment on politics, especially American politics, so I’ll keep the punditry to a minimum here, but I wanted to comment on something I’ve been noticing since election day. I keep reading and hearing African-Americans saying some variation of, “Now I can tell my children truthfully that they can be anything they want to be — even president of the United States.” Before November 4, 2008, none of us could really be sure that it was possible. We needed someone to do it first so that we could believe.
A lot of people ask us why we wrote The Boss of You for women. Why, when the book is about small businesses, and there are so many fabulous men running cool, inspiring businesses? Why cut ourselves off from 50% of readers (well, not quite, because I read somewhere that women buy more books than men, but I don’t feel like looking up the actual stat right now)? And aren’t we all living in a post-feminist world now, anyway, where the battles are all won, and women can do anything we want?
Well, there are a thousand answers to those questions, but this is one: We still need role models, tired as that phrase may sound. We need examples of people like us who have succeeded, who have carved out spaces we would like to occupy. I love men, and I’ve learned a ton from them — had some wonderful male mentors in my life to whom I am forever grateful, and hope to have many more — but I still have to admit that it’s easier for me to put myself in the shoes of another woman, and I know I’m not alone in that.
I still laugh every single time Stephen Colbert says, “I don’t see race.” It’s comedy gold, because we all know it’s pure, unmitigated bullshit — none of us can honestly claim not to see race, or gender, or class, or any of the grid lines that separate us from each other. We try, most of us anyway, but our eyes, and our social conditioning, get in the way. We do see race; we do see gender; we see markers that help us classify ourselves and others in countless ways, and that’s not always a terrible thing. I rejoice when I see women reaching new heights, and I watch avidly for more examples of women in leadership.
And I’m happy today. Because not only is America getting a new president — he is one man, even if he is the president, and he can only do so much. The thing I’m really excited about is to see what happens next, now that millions of people have expanded their definitions of what freedom and opportunity mean. With another set of barriers down, we can all see possibilities that weren’t entirely visible before.
5 responses so far ↓
1 Krissy // Jan 20, 2009 at 5:51 pm
What a wonderful post and so very true.
2 jenny // Jan 21, 2009 at 7:26 am
I have to agree with you. I can completely understand having a role model inspire even greater and more ambitious goals by achieving their own.
I have to say though, that I never felt that because I was a woman that I couldn’t achieve what a man could. Maybe it was my upbringing. But I honestly never had any personal role models as far as successful independent business owners. No men I knew really owned their own successful business – the same with women. I am sure some of my friends and family members wanted to do this but never knew how.
THEN I found your book. I stumbled upon your blog via a link from another blogroll and saw the title and was intrigued. I have been wanting to start up my own business for a while and have been wading through all kinds of books but when I checked your book out, I read it from cover to cover in a couple of days, taking notes as I went.
I am now in the process of building my brand and getting all my legal stuff in order. Oh, and I’m married to a number cruncher (you know, the one thing I’d rather walk across hot coals than do myself?) who will willingly sit down and do the accounting and get excited about it. Ying and yang.
Thank you for this book and thanks for encouraging all kinds of women to get out there and start something!
jenny
3 Lula-Neith Cache // Jan 21, 2009 at 12:03 pm
I don’t understand the ‘slipperiness’ you’re talking about with regard to President Obama. Yes,race is random definitions. But he identifies himself as African-American (this is most important — letting someone decide their own identity). He’s clear on that. Second, his grandparents were probably asked who the ‘black’ baby was they were raising (during their time, dark skin= black/colored. Still does in many ways) . Third, were he a criminal, the description would be “light-skinned black man” or, in the homes of those certain melanin= inherent criminality, n****r. He didn’t make the rules, but these racial ‘definitions’ are there. This is why he’s the first BLACK President, not the first mixed president to the African-American community. If you’ve read his books, you know this doesn’t mean at all he’s ashamed of his caucasian mom or the caucasian grandparents who raised him. He is Black in this country. We are NOT post race. Your book may be great for women, but even you (even myself) have more work to do with regard to race and gender. Best of luck.
4 Lula-Neith Cache // Jan 21, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Just to add: not trying to flame. It’s just that if you’re going to tie race and sex together, then it’s important to put more thought into the connections. As an African-American woman, I just had to state what I see.
5 Lauren // Jan 21, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Thanks, Lula-Neith, for your thoughtful comments — and I don’t take them as a flame at all. I realize in re-reading my post that I didn’t put my “slipperiness” remark in any kind of context, aside from the link to Rebecca Walker’s blog. I apologize for my lack of further analysis or contextualization.
I agree that Obama’s self-identification as African-American is primary. I have also heard him talk in detail about his white family members, and although I have not read his books, my understanding is that he had limited contact with his father, or his father’s family, growing up. What is interesting to me about this is that while he certainly has experienced life as an African-American male, his relationship with his white family members also blurs the self/other divide that most white people experience with regard to non-whites, and I think that the article I linked to does a good job of exploring the race question in greater depth.
I fully agree that we are not post-race. And I don’t think race and gender are interchangeable issues. My intent here was simply to bring forward the question of role models and visible leadership from marginalized groups, and Obama’s presidency provided a jumping-off point for my thoughts.
If you have further thoughts, I’d welcome them. I definitely have more thinking and work to do on race and gender, and I’m grateful for the chance to talk them through. Thanks again for taking the time to write, and for stopping by.
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